Don’t say it at all!
That has always been a saying that my Mother would enforce upon me during my childhood, and I stand strongly by it.
Recently someone found out about the story of my miscarriage, and rather than being at all sympathetic… they found the need to rather lose it on my situation and essentially blame me for how they were treated during the loss of one their children.
This all started when said person found out that I felt very hurt that my ultrasound technician would’ve given me a pictures of my baby, specifically when I asked that they not if they couldn’t confirm everything was okay. Well, my sonographer ended up providing me with three fucking pictures of a baby with no heartbeat. When I miscarried I truly felt like I had been slapped across the face even having been given these pictures, so I asked JM to discard of them for me. It was simply to hard to have them around. Perhaps, if I had at one point gotten to see my baby with a beating heart on one of the ultrasounds… I would have been more compelled to keep the photos, but it was the fact that the photos were pictures of my “passed” baby. Anyway… when this person found out. They basically implied that I am selfish, and that I should feel guilty for even having made this decision. They were quite pissed with me, as they lost a child 10 years ago and would have killed to have an ultrasound photo of their baby – but their sonographer wouldn’t give one to them… Which apparently is my fault.
Honestly people are entitled to their opinions, but when you are hearing about someones personal loss of a child… it is not necessarily a good time to go ahead and instill your opinions upon that person. Its certainly not the time nor the place.
Anyway, I went out to ice cream with some girlfriends last night and the whole idea behind it was to keep my mind off of things… meaning no one was to mention what I am currently going through (an idea my friends had established for the evening)… so much for that because I ended up breaking down in the dessert cafe over everything this girl has said. It gives me comfort in knowing that my girlfriends agree that this girl shouldn’t have instilled those ill vibes against me.
Ugh… I just needed to vent.